My whole 17 years of life pretty much sucked as a whole. I tend to indulge myself in the happy 'now' moments in my life. Like my awesome group of friends who say they'll be there for me no matter what. You know what? I really believe that they will. But I just don't believe that I can bring myself to open myself to them. I cannot bring myself to expose them to the messed up, vulnerable me.
So I live pretty much alone.